Home » Home and Family » Parenting

I Want My Children To Like Me...

Feb 28, 2008
Of course we want our kids to like us! As humans we desire connection and validation. So how do we get our kids to like us without getting walked all over like a door mat or or losing control.

Do you ever back down and give in because you think that your kid won't like you? Is it hard to be the "bad" guy? Or after you correct or discipline your child, do you feel guilty and take back the consequence?

Do you sense that something is not right with your child, but you are afraid to bring it up because you dread starting WWIII? Or worse are you afraid of your child?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then join the ranks of hundreds of parents that I have been talking with with. Parents are scared that their kids will stop talking, sharing, spending time with them.Some parents are afraid that their child will turn violent and break something or hurt a sibling. So parents go out of their way to be "overly hip, or cool towards their kids." Some parents look the other way...but this doesn't feel good either.

Your kids see right through you and they have you over a barrel...You were a kid not long ago...think back to when you had Or didn't have your parent twisted around your finger.

You will find this hard to believe but keep reading what happened to me today:

Just this morning, while coaching a couple about parenting their two young children, The Dad shared "I used to be the easy one, I wanted my kids to like me...now I realize as I have used your methods and am now on top of my discipline...that my kids are liking, respecting and loving me more than before!"

Seem strange? It is, but I will tell you why.

=> Kids want structure.
=> They want to know the rules.
=> They want to know the consequences.
=> They want you to follow through.
=> They want you to supervise them and set limits.
=> Because it makes them feel safe.
=> In their eyes you look predictable and in control.
=> It takes the guess work out of "Oh, know what is going to happen to me when my Mom or Dad find out what I did?
=> It is reassuring and relieves anxiety.

Did you ever think that consistent, no nonsense discipline could be that beneficial? The more parents I speak with and the more families I meet this is what I see: The families that are functioning the best are the ones that have clear rules and expectations that are tied to consequences that are logical to the issue. These parents are consistent, do not back down and command respect from their kids.

And guess what? These kids do not hate their parents. The love and respect their parents because they really know that their parents are working hard to teach them what they need to know in this new complicated world that we live in.

So stop worrying about whether your kids will like you and give them what they need: You to be on 100% of the time calling them on their misbehavior.
About the Author
Susan P. Epstein, LCSW, Parent Coach, helps parents with unmanageable children take control of their family life. A graduate of UC Berkeley School of Social Welfare, Susan practiced psychotherapy for 23 years before becoming a parent coach, writer and speaker. Parents can work with Susan locally face-to-face in Southeastern, CT, or via telephone/SKYPE, globally. http://www.parentingpowers.com/about_susan.htm
Rating:
Please Rate:
(Average: Not rated)
Views: 152
Print Email Report Share
Article Categories
    • Artists
    • Gambling
    • Humanities
    • Humor
    • Movies
    • Music
    • Photography
    • Tattoos
    • Television
    • Classic Cars
    • Motorcycles
    • Recreational Vehicles
    • SUVs
    • Trucks
    • Vans
    • Branding
    • Business Opportunities
    • Careers and Jobs
    • Corporate
    • Customer Service
    • Direct Mail
    • Entrepreneurship
    • Ethics
    • Financing
    • Franchising
    • Home-Based Business
    • Human Resources
    • Import and Export
    • Leadership
    • Management
    • Market Research
    • Marketing and Advertising
    • Negotiation
    • Network Marketing
    • Networking
    • Organizational
    • Presentation
    • Project Management
    • Public Relations
    • Small Business
    • Strategic Planning
    • Team Building
    • Telemarketing
    • Training
    • Data Recovery
    • Databases
    • Games
    • Hardware
    • Networks
    • Operating Systems
    • Programming
    • Security
    • Software
    • Spyware and Viruses
    • Ask an Expert
    • College and University
    • Home Schooling
    • K-12
    • Languages
    • Online Education
    • Psychology
    • Accounting
    • Credit
    • Currency Trading
    • Debt Consolidation
    • Insurance
    • Investing
    • Leasing
    • Loans
    • Mortgage
    • Mutual Funds
    • Personal Finance
    • Stock Market
    • Structured Settlements
    • Taxes
    • Wealth Building
    • Coffee
    • Cooking
    • Gourmet
    • Recipes
    • Wine and Spirits
    • Acne
    • Aerobics
    • Alternative Medicine
    • Beauty
    • Cancer
    • Cosmetics
    • Depression
    • Diabetes
    • Diseases and Conditions
    • Fitness Equipment
    • Fitness
    • Hair Loss
    • Heart Disease
    • Medicine
    • Men's Health
    • Muscle Building
    • Nutrition
    • Skin Care
    • Supplements and Vitamins
    • Weight Loss
    • Women's Health
    • Yoga
    • Feng Shui
    • Gardening
    • Home Appliances
    • Home Security
    • Interior Design
    • Landscaping
    • Affiliate Programs
    • Article Marketing
    • Auctions
    • Audio
    • Banner Advertising
    • Blogging
    • Broadband
    • Domain Names
    • E-Books
    • E-Commerce
    • Email Marketing
    • Ezines and Newsletters
    • Forums
    • Internet Marketing
    • Link Popularity
    • Pay-Per-Click
    • Podcasting
    • RSS
    • Search Engine Marketing
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Security
    • Social Media
    • Spam
    • Video
    • Viral Marketing
    • Web Design
    • Web Development
    • Web Hosting
    • Copyright
    • Cyber Law
    • Intellectual Property
    • National, State, Local
    • Patents
    • Regulatory Compliance
    • Trademarks
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Baseball
    • Basketball
    • Boating
    • Cycling
    • Extreme Sports
    • Fishing
    • Football
    • Golf
    • Hockey
    • Hunting
    • Martial Arts
    • Running
    • Scuba Diving
    • Soccer
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Dating
    • Divorce
    • Marriage
    • Weddings
    • Astrology
    • Buddhism
    • Christianity
    • Faith
    • Hinduism
    • Islam
    • Judaism
    • Meditation
    • Metaphysical
    • New Age
    • Cable and Satellite TV
    • Cell Phones
    • Communication
    • Gadgets and Gizmos
    • GPS
    • Satellite Radio
    • Video Conferencing
    • VoIP
    • Addictions
    • Coaching
    • Goal Setting
    • Motivational
    • Stress Management
    • Time Management
    • Clothing
    • Electronics
    • Fashion
    • Gifts
    • Jewelry
    • Causes and Organizations
    • Environment
    • History
    • Holidays
    • Men's Issues
    • Nature
    • Philosophy
    • Politics
    • Women's Issues
    • World Affairs
    • Air Travel
    • Camping
    • Cruises
    • Destinations
    • Outdoors
    • Article Writing
    • Book Reviews
    • Copywriting
    • Fiction
    • Non-Fiction
    • Poetry
    • Quotes
    • Screenplay
    • Tools and Resources