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Calling ALL Women! Don't Call Him First!

Mar 14, 2008
Picture this - you are out having a great time, you meet a GREAT guy who you just click with. The end of the night rolls around, and you exchange phone numbers. And the panic sets in. "Should I call him? WHEN should I call him? How long should I wait for him to call me?"

As a woman you are entitled to certain things. One is the right to change your mind at any given moment. The other is the right to RECEIVE the first call. So let me make that clear. You do NOT make the first call. Men chase - not women.

It's actually innate - take a look at nature. Who does all the display work to attract a mate? The male. Women let the men display their wares and then pick from the finest. Turn the tables, though, and allow the woman to be the pursuer, and no matter what your intentions, you can come off as needy or worse.

The second reason to let the man be the one to make the first call is "the chase". If a man has to put NO effort into chasing you, you are totally giving him the advantage. He will know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he has you where he wants you, and he can call you, see you, or NOT - at his leisure.

Now, what else does that do? There is a little thought of side-effect to chasing the man that many women do not even think about. It totally eliminates attraction. Think of dating as a game of cat and mouse. Take the fun out, and who wants to play? He certainly won't.

Third - when you let him call you - you are sending the message that you are IN DEMAND. If this guy wants to date you - if he sees you as valuable and worth pursuing, he is going to believe that other men also see the same thing. So don't call him and tell him HOW available you are!

Want to take it a step further? The first time he calls - PRETEND you are not sitting by the phone waiting - and let him get your voicemail. And yes, you can listen to it right away, but give it a few hours before you return his call. After all - you are a busy, in demand woman!

The fourth and final reason - allowing this to continue for a while - him calling you to ask you out - lets you know 100% that HE is INTERESTED in you. We all know what it feels like to sit there and wonder if he really is into you or not. Well, ladies, if he keeps calling, he IS. If you call though, every time you think about him, you are not going to know if he is chatting just to be nice. That will breed insecurity, then more needy behavior and - you guessed it - snuff the attraction.

So be the woman, and let him be the man. Let him call you. And if he doesn't call? His loss, honey. He was not showing you his true face then anyway, and you don't want that. So go and let him get you girl!
About the Author
You CAN get dating advice targeted specifically for WOMEN. Check out Dating Advice for Women by Christian Carter, and How to Catch Him and Keep Him
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