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Does your husband have a mistress?

Mar 20, 2008
Has the thought ever crossed your mind--my husband may be having an affair? There are a number of signs to look for without actually confronting him. The following things to look out for don't necessarily mean that he's cheating, but they may provide you with some clues if he is.

One of the most obvious clues is tall tales detailing why he was late coming home from work. If he offers this information up a little too readily, or if his explanations don't make any sense, your man might be having an affair.

On the other hand, maybe your husband has started buying you a lot of gifts lately. He may be uncharacteristically showering you with all sorts of nice things, not because of any newfound appreciation of you, but out of guilt for having an affair.

On the other hand, is your significant other picking fights with you more than usual? This type of behavior serves two purposes. First, finding reasons to be angry at you might help him to cope with his guilt. Secondly, becoming enraged and storming out of the house provides the perfect opportunity to meet up with a lover.

If your husband has taken a newfound interest in making himself look good, ironing his clothes or drenching himself in sexy cologne, he many not be doing so for your benefit. Rather, this is yet another sign that he could be cleaning himself up for someone on the side.

Finally, has your level of intimacy decreased? Has the "spark" gone out of your relationship? Have you stopped spending quality time together? A lack of physical and/or emotional intimacy can be another clue that something just isn't right in your relationship.

Remember, this is not a comprehensive guide. The important thing to remember is to trust your own inner feelings. Are you suspicious of your husband because he's been engaging in behavior indicative of an affair or are you so insecure that you see the signs in the most innocuous things?

If he is, in fact, cheating, remember that healing after an affair is possible. For most couples recovery is possible and the marriage can become better than it ever was. Take a long look at what you've put into your relationship before you decide to leave. And regardless of the outcome for your relationship, make sure to thoroughly address your feelings about the betrayal or the hurt will resurface in the future and cause more problems.
About the Author
Infidelity creates a pain like no other. At the Affair Recovery Center we know from experience. We can help you cope with infidelity. Don't suffer another day. Start healing from infidelity right now.
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