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Give Your Strategy a Makeover and Begin Attracting the Men!

Mar 25, 2008
Human natures allows or even enables each of us to use our intelligence to build strategies that keep each of us from suffering from the greatest of heartaches, rejections or embarrassments. Some people use strategies that include pushing, hounding, whining, pleading or even lying. Most of the time, though, these methods backfire.

Women are also guilty of this - sometimes knowingly and sometimes not. And sometimes these strategies even work - but so many times they have the opposite effect from what they were intended to have. Most of the time, they do not attract the man, they scare him away.

One strategy women use is bribery. This is when a woman becomes the helpful, thoughtful, nice girlfriend in order to get the guy's interest. Thinking - wrongly - that if she proves to him how sweet and nice she is, he will become attracted to her. It usually does not work - simply because attraction, for men, does not work that way.

Strategy two is the "coercion" strategy. This is the plan used when a woman tries to get her man to confess his feelings for her by confessing her OWN feelings for him. It is the hope for reciprocation in order to fill a need within her own life. Many times, however, that expectant air that you adopt, waiting for him to say "I love you too" will be what ends up driving him away.

The third strategy women use is to simply have sex with him in order to develop the "instant relationship". This nearly always backfires, because SEX, to a man, DOES NOT a relationship make. It is simply sex, and he will take it if you give it to him, and why should he give more if he can get that for free?

The reason women do these things is because it makes SENSE to do them. It makes perfect sense to be kind and helpful to man you want to attract. It is logical to articulate your feelings for a man, hoping to spark that confession from him as well. It also is understandable to have sex with a man, knowing what having sex means to you as a woman, when you think it would mean the same to him.

Unfortunately, these actions broadcast to a man in a much more subtle way than words - that you are afraid and possibly needy or frantic.

I KNOW that is not what you are trying to accomplish. But that is what he sees in your attitude - and that is why these methods do not work when you are trying to attract a man.

So what DOES attract a man? There are definitely certain attitudes that men find attractive. Try on an attitude that tells him you don't settle for a man, you will not let a man control your life or that you would walk away from a man if he began exhibiting behaviors that you do not approve of.

Another thing a man will find attractive is if you show him you are independent, and expect him to maintain his friendships and his hobbies, and that you will too. Show him that you are a genuine woman, not given to jealousy and pettiness - and he will see your worth.

So begin the transformation of your love life by transforming your outlook and attitude, and see just what a smart, healthy, attractive and worthwhile woman like yourself can accomplish with such a small change.
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