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A Date Starts Much Earlier Than You Think

Mar 25, 2008
When you think about it, the conventional idea that the relationship of a date starts when you pick up your girl for that first night on the town is a bit flawed. If you have not started building the relationship and finding out important information about her before then, you have lost a lot of good opportunities.

The truth is except when you are set up for a date and meet her for the first time that night, most of the time the act of dating starts with flirtation long before you formally go out. And if you use that time before the date in a smart way, your chances of having a great evening with her are much better.

Whether she knows it or not, you start dating a girl even during the get acquainted phase. The only change in what happens during those critical days or weeks leading up to the date and the formal event is in how you handle them. But if within your mind the act of dating that girl of your dreams starts as soon as you determine that you want the date, you have hours of valuable time to get to know her and lay the groundwork, for what will become a wonderful romance once you actually ask her out and begin the time when you are "a couple."

The common setting you and the girl you have your eye on is a great place to strike up an acquaintance and then a friendship. If you know the girl through work or school or a shared social scene where you are both relaxed, that's ideal. Since you probably both share other friends there, it's very easy to get introduced and to learn more about each other in a group setting. These "group dates" are relaxed and at ease and a great way to casually start a relationship building that may lead to dating and romance.

By using this innocent and unassuming environment to ask questions that open the girl up, you can find out both if and how to ask her out when the time comes. This subtle "spying" can save you a lot of heartache on that first date. We all have been through first dates that are horrible and usually they happen when something comes out about the girl that you wish you had known before you asked her out. Now is the time to get that information gathering done.

Obviously one of the things you will skillfully ask about as you build up toward the first date is whether she is even eligible for dating. So finding out about her dating status and any other issues that may block a future social outing with you can save you that unpleasant experience of asking a great girl on a date and getting turned down.

This "friendship" stage is also a good time to find out some general information that would have a big impact on the success of a date and the hopes for a relationship. Differences between you and her in religion, politics or racial or cultural bias issues can be easily flushed out in a casual discussion which can help you make a decision about whether to ask her out and what kinds of thing would qualify as a good date experience for the girl you have your eye on.

Along with these other important areas of research your informal time with her can yield, there is this hard to pin down thing called "chemistry" that can make or break your romance with her. You can find out if you sense that attraction growing between you and if you both have enough in common for a strong launch of the relationship. And if you know before you pick her up for the first date that this relationship may be a keeper, that is going to make that first romantic night together even more fun and exciting.
About the Author
You can find more creative first date questions at MyRomanticDateIdeas.com.
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