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7 Funny Wedding Toasts

Apr 6, 2008
When did people start giving wedding toasts? Any idea? It wasn't until recently. That surprises many people. In spite of the recency of the tradition, the tradition seems to have taken hold. And now many people within the wedding party are expected to give toasts. Toasts can be solemn or funny. And they're a great chance to wish the couple well.

Do you have to give a wedding toast? Are you nervous? You should be. This is the couple's big day, and you could ruin it! OK, it probably won't be that bad. But It makes sense for you to be nervous. Ultimately you should find a good guide to teach you how to create a wedding toast, but for now, here's some comic relief to take the edge off your nerves.

Here are some funny thoughts:

1. He who hesitates is lost. But in marriage, he who hesitates saves himself.

2. Getting married for sex is like buying a meal for the free mint.

3. I haven't spoken to my wife for 2 days -- she doesn't like me to interrupt her.

4. What would it be like to live in a world without men? There'd be no crime, and a lot of happy fat women.

5. If you see a man open the car door for his wife, it's either a new car . . . or a new wife.

6. Marriage is like a phone call when you've been sleeping. First there's the ring. And then you wake up. -Evelyn Hendrickson

7. There are three rings to marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.

Now, we know these probably aren't helping that much with YOUR toast. But maybe they put a smile on your face, and now you can get to work on your toast. Good luck!
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