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How To Get Your Ex Back With True Confidence

Apr 28, 2008
The first decision you need to make is to truthfully, answer the question, "why, do I want this girlfriend back". The easy answer is "because I miss her." The truthful answer comes from knowing what qualities she brought into the relationship. You also need to know those important aspects of your relationship, which now cause you to feel alone or feel as though you failed. The truth is maybe you did fail and maybe the breakup is the result of the manner, in which you treated her. Maybe you did not treat her as someone worthy of respect. Ask yourself, how did I treat her? Was I kind or was I abusive? Was I affectionate all of the time or only in those times when we were alone? Was she an object or person in this relationship?

These are hard questions and only a man of integrity has the ability to answer them truthfully, and the wisdom to recognize and accept responsibility for mistakes. Only a man willing to admit to his ex-girlfriend his recognition of his own faults and his willingness to change is capable of getting back an ex-girlfriend, but the only problem is that this could be a great challenge to many, specially for men that blame the other person every time for the crisis in the relation.

Breakups are not sudden happenings they are the result of a compilation of events or actions, which cause people to say, "I don't need this in my life." When we come to this conclusion whether it is another person, a job, an inconsiderate boss or whatever it is, we must act on this conclusion and end the relationship. Your ex-girlfriend was not receiving from the relationship those benefits she needs which are valuable to her. Perhaps the reason for the breakup was her desire to find someone else capable of providing the essential elements of a healthy relationship.

The other side of coin is she may not have the maturity to know what she wants from a relationship. She may be lacking in the skills to succeed in a healthy relationship, and the cause of the breakup may rest solely within her. You may be more skilled in those qualities required for a lasting relationship, and you may be a person who needs someone with skills comparable to your own.

Perhaps as the saying goes, she may not be worthy of you at this time in her life. This is not, to denigrate her as a person she may simply be too young, too inexperienced and too immature to appreciate all you have to offer. Just as an infant, she cannot walk until she learns to crawl. There is a readiness required in the developmental process involved in relationships. Your ex-girlfriend may not have reached the stage of readiness needed to sustain or to persevere in a lasting relationship.

If you find that your ex if the right person for you and the relation went bad for reasons other than lack of maturity, you will be ready to apply a detailed plan to get her love back that is available for free in our website.
About the Author
Andres Berger talks often about how to get your ex back. Subscribe to our newsletter and learn how you can do it with confidence.
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