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Marriage After An Affair

Apr 29, 2008
There are few things that have such potential for destroying a relationship as betrayal has. Affairs destroy trust and shatter hope. An affair is not only a physical betrayal, but it is also a emotional betrayal. Sex is never just sex. However, if the connection in the marriage is strong enough, even an affair can be overcome, and the marriage can become even stronger than it has ever been.

Among the essential elements of recovery is rebuilding trust. There is nothing that betrays trust more than an affair. So, in order to regain the trust one must work hard to assure the other person that it is safe to trust again. Though not an easy task, it is a realistic one and it has great benefits.

Nothing will test your love and commitment quite like being betrayed in this way. It is hard, but realistic, that this can be overcome and the benefits will be worth the effort. Things such as physical love and emotional love will not be easy to convey to your partner, but these things will be realized with a lot of hard work. It will not be fast and it will not be easy, but it can be done. It will take at least 18 months to work through the recovery process and must be accompanied by building new, healthier habits by both spouses.

One of the main things to be learned will be compromise. This must be done in order to continue in the recovery process. A new and better relationship must be the goal and habits and attitudes will need to evolve.

Mentally, knowing that your partner has been unfaithful is hard to work through. If you cannot get over this fact, there will not be much chance of your relationship working out, but if you can work through this, then your relationship will stand a chance.

In the recovery process, it may take a long time to reestablish the level of intimacy, both physical and emotional, that was present before. Now is the time to focus on the other parts of your relationship and seeing the other good qualities of your spouse. This may be the best opportunity to strengthen your marriage that you will ever have. However, this will take time and it is better to do it right the first time than to try and try again.

Even with all the strides taken to repair your relationship, it still may not be able to be saved. Your partner may not even think it is worth saving. The recovery process, however, can make your marriage even stronger than it was before and the person who had the affair may just realize what they wanted was at home waiting, but many trials must be passed before forgiveness can take place.

Although an affair is often something that takes a marriage beyond repair. If those involved want to save the marriage they can. Often times the marriage will become stronger than ever. Saving a marriage is well worth it because humans are designed to share intimacy, both physically and emotionally at a deep level. It's hard to do that even without the added complication of an affair, but once achieved, the peace found is incomparable.
About the Author
Infidelity creates a pain like no other. At the Affair Recovery Center we know from experience. We can help you cope with infidelity. Don't suffer another day. Start healing from infidelity right now.
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