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How to Live With a Depressed Loved One

Aug 17, 2007
What do I know about living with a depressed loved one?...in a word...plenty!

For over six years my life was ruled by my wife's severe and debilitating depression, as was her life. If you live with someone who suffers from depression or anxiety, I don't have to explain to you what life can be like!

Sharon's depression cost us everything, including our home, our savings, our investments and my own health. We tried for years to find something that would help her because traditional medical intervention had very limited benefit for her, and non-traditional approaches drained us of our financial well being.

We tried just about every single avenue that we could think of with almost no results...but then, with the help of a few key people who came into our lives, we were finally able to sift through all the information we had gathered and find some answers.

We consulted countless "experts", each with their own field of specialization. Although not one of them was really able to offer much in the way or results, we did find that each avenue we explored did hold a small piece of the puzzle. So, we sifted through the information that we gathered over years of research and we found what we consider to be the truth.

It was like sifting through thousands of jigsaw puzzle pieces, all from different puzzles, and trying to find the pieces that fit together to complete the proper picture...and we did it!

As we implemented what we learned for Sharon's healing, I found that by implementing the same information for my own bennifit had a tremendous impact on my ability to live with Sharon's depression, which put me in a better position to help her heal.

What we discovered through this mountain of research is that there are what we call, "The Four Dimensions of Healing". Understanding these four dimensions as they apply to someone who is struggling with depression in the family, I believe, is critically important in helping you make it through the really tough times with your loved one's depression.

Clearly, in the space available in this article I can not go into enough detail to solve your family depression issues, but I can point you into the right direction so that you know what you need to do next in order to start making real changes in your life.

The for dimensions of healing are:

1. The Physical Dimension: When living with a depressed love one it is important to understand what depression really is on a physical level. Study what areas of the brain cause depression, study what neuro-transmitters are, what anti-depressants do and how they work. In addition, it is important to understand what is happening to your own physiology when you are dealing with the severe stress that depression causes in the family. Learn what stress is, what chemicals in your body cause stress and what affect those chemicals have on other systems in your body.

Once you have a better understanding of the physical dimension, you will be in a much better position to make decisions in terms of medications, diet and exercise. You will better understand why one thing works for you while another does not. Until you understand the physical dimension, you are shooting in the dark and at the mercy of your doctor's text books...and they are not always right!

2. The Spiritual Dimension: Understanding the difference between spirituality and religion is important. This helps you identify and clarify your own spiritual position and health. It is even more important to understand the role of spirituality in the healing process. Without this understanding, you are missing a huge step in the healing process and you are making it so much harder on yourself than it really has to be to cope with the stress.

Do some research on the importance and the role of spirituality in healing. Even if you are not religious, an understanding of the spiritual dimension of healing will play a pivotal role in living with a depressed loved one.

3. The Dimension of the Mind: When dealing with depression or anxiety, or with any other illness for that matter, understanding the role and the power of the subconscious mind is absolutely key in making changes in your life. The subconscious mind controls 99 percent of your life without you even knowing about it. Understanding its power and its functions give you the power to change unconscious beliefs which ultimately change your behavior, the way you respond to life's challenges, and the way you feel.

Don't ignore this most powerful dimension, it allows you to change your life at will!

4. The Dimension of Natural Law: probably the most overlooked area of healing is the dimension of natural law. Understanding how the universe around you works and what your role is in it can give you more power over illness and stress than most people could ever imagine. Study the universal laws such as the law of vibration and attraction, the law of perpetual transmutation of energy, the law of polarity and others.

You don't have to be a quantum physicist to understand the basics and to be able to apply those principles to make changes in your life. Learn the basics of quantum theory and open your mind to it's possibilities.

Once we had a more clear understanding of these four dimensions of healing, both Sharon and I were able to make the right decisions for ourselves regarding her illnesses. Sharon was able to make the right decisions to help her make some real progress in her healing and I was able to make the right decisions to help me survive the devastating affects depression on the family.

Everything you need to understand the four dimensions of healing is available to you on line. Take the time to learn about them and you will change your live...we certainly did!
About the Author
Steve Lowell is the author of the audio program "Victory for the Silent Victim: A Survival Guide for those Whose Loved One Suffers from Depression or Anxiety" at http://www.VictoryForTheSilentVictim.com
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