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Online Dating Advice For Singles - Online Speed Dating

Jun 17, 2008
Speed dating is all the vogue these days among busy singles. This information talks about what exactly it is, and how can it be carried out online.

What is it?

Believe it or not, speed dating was introduced in the late 1990's by an orthodox rabbi as a way for single Jewish people to meet other jews and therefore avoid marrying outside of their faith. These singles could meet potential Jewish marriage mates in a supervised setting. The dating worked so well and was so well thought of that the secular community latched on to it, and a movement of sorts was born.

In commercial speed dating, prospects gather at a pub or café, often on weekdays during dinner hour, and each is given a name tag and a scorecard. Couples are matched up, and the "game" begins. Everybody joins with their first match and five to seven minutes of getting to know each other ensue. A timer is rung when time is up, each person marks on their card whether they found this person to be somebody whom they wish to talk to again, and the men move on to the next table, to meet the next lady. Later, if both participants are in agreement, the coordinators of the speed date give out phone numbers. Generally singles make ten contacts during an event, and about 50 per cent of all members participating walk away with at least one phone number.

So How can this be done online?

There are at least two easy ways that a type of speed dating can be done online. The first involves using e-mail or private messaging through your favourite dating site, the second involves live chat rooms. Both require a little bit of energy spent setting them up so that they go smoothly.

E-mail

For e-mail/PM speed dating, you would contact nine or eleven other singles, an even mix of men and women, with the leftover person being the opposite gender from yourself (if you're not participating, use an even number of singles, for example, five men, five women).

Set up the arrangements as follows:

* Allot five days for completion of the "speed dates".

* All men would be given the e-mail or PM address of all of the prospective women, and vice versa.

* Each participant agrees to send a message to each of their potential dates within three days, asking five questions (decide the number before inviting participants!) which they consider to be "must knows" about singles they are considering meeting.

* speed Daters agree to answer those questions within two days of receiving them.

* After the five days have elapsed, each single sends the organizer the list of their five or six contacts, along with a note beside each name of whether they wish to talk more with that person or not. The organizer sends notes back to each single with the list of their potential partners who have indicated a mutual interest. From there, it's up to each single to continue contact or not.

Chat room

Chat rooms are in real time, so a day and a time would need to be planned, along with determining which singles you plan to invite. Keep the group small, no more than ten to twelve couples, and if you plan to participate, make sure there is an odd number, with the oddball being the opposite gender from yourself.

Some free Australian sites allow groups that can be set up just for this purpose:

An online speed date might work something like this:

* Decide the length of the speed dates. Five, six, or seven minutes are most common.

* You MUST plan out the order of the pairings in advance. For example, Woman Number One meets with Man One, Man Two, Man Three, Man Four, and Man Five, in that order.

* Everybody gathers in the chat room at the appointed time, and the dates begin. At the organizer's signal, each couple goes to private messaging for the duration of the five to seven minute date.

* When the allotted time has passed, each person private messages the organizer with a yes or a no for the person they've just met with. At the organizer signal, the entire group then move on to a private message session with the next person on their list.

* At the end of the speed date, the organizer privately lets each participant know who expressed a mutual interest in getting to know them better, giving each person the e-mail information for their potential future dates. It's as easy as that!

Why do this?

For singles whose lives are busy and who find themselves without much time to meet many other people, speed dating is a great way to establish a wider pool of people to choose from, in a short amount of time. Using one of the online versions of speed dating in conjunction with your favourite dating site, you can dig a little bit deeper than personal profiles show and get a better idea of whether these people are interesting enough to look into further. And besides which... it's fun and may net you some new friends!
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