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He Learnt the Hard Way, Infidelity Isn't Worth It

Jun 29, 2008
She wasn't stupid, he'd changed and the infidelity alarm bell started to ring. He was taking more interest in his appearance, disappearing off without saying where he was going and spending less and less time with her. She didn't even want to consider that he was having an affair but his actions spoke louder than words so she decided to do some research to find out what the signs of infidelity were.

It didn't take long, infidelity is really common and most of the signs of infidelity are very similar from one marriage to another. She quickly read through a check list:

* Your partner has lost interest in you
* He is taking more interest in his appearance
* He has started to work late
* He avoids conversation
* He has become very secretive
* He doesn't want to spend time with you
* He is drawing more cash out of the bank

The list continued and the more she read the more she realized that she wasn't wrong, there were obvious signs of infidelity in her relationship.

She didn't panic she made the decision not to jump to any conclusions but to prove what she was now beginning to believe (that he was having an affair). She did some investigating and discovered how to catch a cheating spouse down to the smallest detail. She even learnt how to trace a cell phone number. One thing she was certain about was that she wasn't going to let him get away with infidelity.

It didn't take long, he hadn't realized that she had her suspicions about the affair and he had become less careful. Now that she knew all the signs of infidelity she could read him like a book.

Once she discovered the truth she decided to follow her own unique line of approach and rather than confronting him, using her new found knowledge about infidelity she laid a trail that made it appear blatantly obvious that she was having an affair. Her method of teaching him a lesson was to see how he liked it!!

She watched his reaction over the next week and could see he was becoming less and less comfortable. Given that he was having an affair he could quickly see the obvious signs of infidelity in his wife's daily routine:

* She started to diet
* She went shopping and bought a whole new wardrobe
* She started wearing more makeup
* She said she was going out with her girlfriends several times a week
* She started spending more on housekeeping but less time in the kitchen
* She started leaving the room to talk on the phone

Each day she made herself look more and more guilty of infidelity until he finally cracked and confronted her. He just couldn't bear the thought that his wife was having an affair.

For her the joke was on him and she took the opportunity to lay all the evidence on the table about his infidelity. She could tell him who he was having an affair with, when he was seeing her, what her phone number was, where she worked and where she lived.

He just couldn't believe that she knew all about it and that she could go to such lengths to teach him a lesson but what he had learned was how he felt when he thought his wife was having an affair and therefore understood what she must have been going through since she had learnt of his infidelity.

They talked for hours, discussed what had been going wrong in their marriage and why he had cheated on her. They realized that his infidelity was a symptom and not the cause of their marriage problems and, given she had recently done so much research, she knew where to go to get help.

They knew it wasn't going to be easy but their decision was for him to end the affair. She would learn how to forgive his infidelity and between them they would find out how to rebuild the trust, sort out their marriage problems and save their marriage.
About the Author
For advice on infidelity, how to catch a cheating spouse, marriage problems or how to save your marriage visit commonmarriageproblems.marriagehealth.com
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