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If You Don't Like Your Life - Change It (Part I)

Jul 9, 2008
Nearly everyone could improve his or her life in one way or another. Sadly, however, few people ever do anything about it, either out of tolerance, fear, or lack of knowledge about how to change their lives for the better.

Obstacle 1: Tolerance
Most people resist making any changes to their lives - even when they wish for it - because they've achieved a certain level of tolerance to the way things are. That's fine if you're satisfied with your life as it is. If you're not, however, then your tolerance is merely setting you up for more of the same. For example, your relationship with your partner may just OK but not great, but since it's tolerable you don't attempt to make it great.

Obstacle 2: Fear
Fear of change is a powerful force that holds most people back. Things may not be great but the situation is familiar and you know what to expect. Change means facing the unknown. What if you change things and things are worse? For example, what if you leave the job you hate only to find that the new one is worse?

Obstacle 3: Lack of Knowledge
Another thing that holds people back is not knowing what they really want. You know that you want more out of life but you're not sure what that is. Or you may have some idea of what you want but don't seem to be making any progress towards that.

What holds you back?
Whatever it is, you're not alone. "Ron" has always been very creative and decided that he could make good money as a photographer but meanwhile, he had decided to finally get his B.A. just to have it. He also worked as a waiter to support himself. Between school and work, he made wooded jewelry boxes as a hobby. Ron was unhappy with his life because he had difficulty making ends meet as a waiter and really wanted to be a photographer.

"Rosie" had been working as an administrator for the same abusive boss for nine years, all the while wanting to make a change but was afraid of leaving. How would she see her friends at work again? How could she get as much vacation time at a new job? So she continued to work for her abusive boss while wishing she had a different job.

These examples may seem to have simple solutions but the emotions that accompany making a transition can blind people to seeing how they can get their needs met. Is there a transition that you'd like to make but haven't found a way to yet? What's holding you back from living the life you really want? I'll be happy to help you work through these questions and many others.
About the Author
I have been helping people reach their personal and professional goals for the past 14 years. There's nothing more satisfying than helping someone reach their potential for success. I would like the opportunity to help you reach your goals. I am a Professional Coach with a Ph.D. in Psychology and a specialty in Goal Achievement and Transitions. Check out my website: www.ParamountTransitions.com then call me for a free consultation.
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