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Online Personal Ads - How to Talk to Women

Jay Reiss, M.S.W.
Jul 13, 2008
I'm an Online Dating Coach, and many of the ads I see on the Internet are shocking! There are some (often written by guys looking for women) who write their ads like they're trying to sell used furniture in the classified section of their daily papers! The women's ads are often just as bad - often containing very little substantial information - or the ads just come across as demanding.

Take for example this ad, written by a 41-year-old woman --

professional who enjoys open conversation - 41

"I love to talk about books that have struck you bizarre or interesting. I do want someone to hang out with, and must enjoy talking about politics, books, places and wine. Must love chocolate!"

We can immediately see that this woman likes to communicate (and that's a good thing, yes?) and she also enjoys "talking about everything" - including "books that have struck you bizarre." (Are we talking about Stephen King novels here?) In addition to that, it would be great if you (as a guy) can talk about "politics, places, and wine" - but the main thing is that you love chocolate?

It's hard to imagine what sort of guy she'll attract with that ad!

Have a look at this next online dating ad - it's from a young man who describes himself as the "Tattoo Teddy Bear" -

tattoo teddy bear - 29

"i just want a good girl that knows how to treat a man with respect."

Short, sweet, and to the point, yes?

So is it any wonder that so many single men and women are just like "two ships passing in the night?"

One of the secrets to writing effective online personal ads is to write your ads just like you're having a real, live conversation with your reader.

Or to express things in terms of what NOT to do:

1. Don't write your Internet Dating Ads so they sound like magazine advertisements!

2. Don't "talk down" to your readers.

3. Don't write a one-sentence ad and expect to get many replies!

Follow these guidelines instead:

1. Talk about yourself in terms of who you are as a person, what you enjoy doing on a date, and list some of your hobbies and interests.

2. Using colorful, imaginative language, and paint a picture of how she or he will feel when you're together on a date. Use examples, anticipate questions, and be upbeat and optimistic. Give your reader a sense of what being with you is like - and describe that in some detail when writing your dating ad.

3. Talk about some of your best qualities. (Are you warm and friendly? A good listener? Are you compassionate and understanding?)

4. What's the benefit (i.e., the "payoff") for answering your ad right now? And finally...

5. Last but not least - use a spell-checker and make sure that both your spelling and your grammar are correct before your ad is published!

By following these tips and guidelines, you'll be on your way to a successful online dating campaign!
About the Author
Want to meet beautiful women online today? Or handsome men? Check out this very Special Offer: Get three FREE online personal ads and a FREE Online Dating Profile! Go to my Online Dating site today at http://www.online-dating-coach.com
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