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The Real Costs Of Divorce

Jul 20, 2008
Despite the images that are sometimes portrayed in the media, a divorce can be a bitter experience even if the parties involved are fairly friendly through the process. Should there be kids involved in the crossfire, the experience of a divorce can be made even worse. Children can be left feeling like there is something missing with the breakdown of their family structure, ultimately resulting in many children having feelings of being abandoned and left by their parents. Other more severe emotional concerns can crop up later in life as a result of a divorce as well for children.

Whilst divorce grabs the headlines for its financial impact especially on the husband, the human cost far outweighs the financial burden.In a case where children are involved the emotional cost can be severe.Fathers feel removed from their children and find it increasingly difficult to engage with their children and this separation can lead to depression as they try to identify their role as a divorced father.

For the mother, a divorce can often feel like the heaping on of additional responsibility that wasn't as big of an issue with two parents. The child rearing now being almost squarely on her shoulders, a mother can often feel broken down and emotionally overstretched, as her children now rely on her for support and love almost exclusively in many cases. Children can feel alienated as a result of not being nurtured enough.

The biggest human cost must surely be the children who have had no bearing on how the situation has arisen but are nonetheless caught in the crossfire. If the breakdown of the marriage is not an amicable one then the resentment and anger of the parents has a devastating effect on the children who do not possess the maturity our coping skills to deal with this traumatic event.

Many times, kids feel like they are responsible for the parents splitting, which can also have major emotional ramifications. They can be hesitant to develop emotional bonds with other people, have difficulty making friends, and can ultimately feel awkward in social situations.

Beyond the children, though, the parents can feel emotional scarring if they are cheated upon while in the marriage. Feelings of rejection and distrust of significant others can result, and the person can feel like they're always going to be cheated upon. The partner that committed the infidelity can feel as though they're guilty of hurting someone to the point that they may never forgive themselves.

With divorce rates as high as they are in many countries worldwide, divorce is a reality. Even if marriages do not intend to end in divorce, many often do, with often traumatic results to the families broken up. Because divorces are a no-win proposition in many cases, the best advice to figure should you be considering that route is to ensure the breaking up of the marriage happens smoothly and friendly.

While no-one can pretend that divorce is not traumatic it could be a new opportunity. As the saying goes 'As one door closes, another opens' and it could open up a whole range of possibilities that a person with a positive frame of mind can do.Whatever you do you keep the cost to a minimum, both financial
About the Author
Infidelity creates a pain like no other. At the Affair Recovery Center we know from experience. We can help you cope with infidelity. Don't suffer another day. Start healing from infidelity right now.
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