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Relationships That Empower Us - Transformation Through Trust

Peri Enkin
Jul 21, 2008
We live in a world where loneliness runs rampant and has been identified as the most dominant social problem in America today.

The longing for real connection with another human being can keep us from fulfilling our potentials and giving our gifts to the world. It is just that important an ingredient for genuine success and happiness in life.

But genuine connection often eludes us. We get disappointed. People let us down or we are not sure who to trust. Cultivating healthy relationships is something that takes consciousness and wisdom.

This month I stumbled upon an article in the Utne Reader about mentoring. It contains an interview with Richard Leider - author of Claiming Your Place at the Fire. When posed with this question: What makes for the best relationship between mentor and apprentice? This is what he says:

"The core of it to me is trust. And the only way to build trust is through deep presence - meaning that both parties need to sense that it's an embodied thing, an earned thing. I also think the great mentors are lovers of questions. They have the presence to hit the pause button and listen. And then they ask more questions. It is out of this deeper presence, this willingness to be patient, from which a meaningful relationship will grow."

For me, this is a beautiful description of how mentoring works in my life. Personally I am blessed to have mentors that I trust. My life is easier and my personal fulfillment greater because of our regular and consistent weekly talks.

I also know that my long-term clients have a similar relationship with me. Something magical happens as we spend extended time together outside of ordinary daily life. We create a living container for transformation- full of respect and founded on trust.

As a mentor I offer my full presence to provide safety, empathy and support for whatever is currently alive in my clients lives. This includes the bigger questions of life and the management of the daily nitty-gritty as well.

Here is the thing: When we want to make the shift from living an ordinary life to experiencing an extraordinary one we enter a process. A great life is not a product. It is a living event. Relationships that empower us help support our process. They help us to sing the unique songs in our hearts.

When we do, the world is blessed with the music that we are. And everyone - every single one of us has incredible music to be sung.
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