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The Top 10 Ways to Destroy Your Marriage

Jul 31, 2008
Building a strong marriage takes work, dedication and set rules. Your marriage should be something that you honor and cherish and never let anyone come and take that away from you. Although this list has simple tasks it is so important that you take them to heart and practice them.

Never...

1- Yell- Most of us are slow to say thank you, forget to encourage and quick to explain what people are doing wrong. Your marriage won't be perfect, your partner won't be perfect but that doesn't mean you need to stop working. Raising your voice in a heated moment doesn't encourage anyone to change it simply flips on the other persons defense mechanisms.

2- Lie- As soon as you start destroying the trust your spouse and you have built is the moment your marriage needs saving. If you can't trust each other then problems will multiple faster than you can count them.

3- Being Easily Offended- We have to believe that our spouse has our best interest at heart, that things they say are meant to build us up, encourage us and help us be a better person. If we don't look at the things they say in that light then we will become offended and refuse to change. Trust your spouse and change.

4- Marry your work- There is such thing as too much time at the office. You have a spouse who is a person that needs to know you care, everyone wants to be cared for not just supported. Be sure that your priorities are within your marriage to your spouse and not your work.

5- Shift Blame- Accusing each other won't open the doors to effective communication. As a matter of fact it is instinct to defend your actions when you are accused, no matter how wrong, rather than change and admit the wrong. Use gentle words to discuss not accuse.

6- Stop Saying I Love You- You may think your spouse knows it but that doesn't mean they know you do. When you hear someone say I love you it confirms that they know they love you too. Sometimes in the hustle of the world it is easy to forget how much those three little words can mean.

7- Stop Listening- Multi-tasking while you are listening to your spouse is never a good idea. Watching TV, working on the computer, reading, or whatever it is turn off the distraction while your spouse communicates with you. When you tune them out with your ear so does your heart.

8- Think Your Spouse has ESP- It is a proven fact that we don't know the thoughts of any other person. So don't expect your spouse to know things you haven't directly told them

9- Think Immorally- Actions and desires start as thoughts, if you allow yourself to think anything about fidelity then your chances of crossing the line increase 10 fold. Just don't allow it.

10- Bring Up Past Wrongs- Allow your spouse to make mistakes, but even more so allow them to change. We ask them to change but then when they do we constantly throw their mistake back in their face. This gets frustrating really quick and discouraging to make any future change. Just leave them buried.

Marriages are important, take a lot of work, but can bring you more happiness than anything else if they are properly cultivated. Take the time to learn how to save your marriage.
About the Author
Bart Icles know the importance of strong marriage and the support that brings to your life. Don't be afraid to to study how to 'Save My Marriage' before it needs saving. It is worth your time not to give up.
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