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Tips For Dealing With The Pain Of A Cheating Spouse

Aug 6, 2008
While there's no doubt dealing with the pain of a cheating spouse is unlike quite no other, you don't have to live the life of a victim, and although it may not seem like it right now, there are steps you can take to make the best of out this horrible situation. Whether you decide to leave your spouse, file for divorce, or stay and work things out is really up to you as after all, you're the one this is happening to and you're the one who has to live with your decision.

But, hopefully, some of the following tips will help you to make up your mind during this trying time and get you on your way to healing and emerging a better person for it.

- Face Reality: Ignoring the obvious certainly won't make things any better, in fact, the longer you go without acknowledging the truth, all the more painful it will be when you finally have no choice but to do so.

- Evaluate Your Situation: During a moment of complete clarity and clear headedness, honestly evaluate your situation in terms of not only your finances, but also to decide if your marriage is really worth saving or not.

- Get a Makeover or Buy a New Wardrobe: You'd be surprised at what a new haircut, new makeup, or a new wardrobe can do for your self esteem as well as for your mood overall. Lose a few pounds, join the gym, redecorate the house, or take a vacation. Whatever changes you make, just be sure they're really for you and no one else!

- Join a Support Group: Consider joining a support group, online or off, or seek counseling from a professional in order to work through your feelings of betrayal and anger. Don't try to handle this all on your own, but if you need time to be alone, by all means do whatever it takes to make yourself feel better.

- Reach Out to Friends and Family: Build a reliable team of support with friends and family who are willing to listen and offer advice if you're interested or in need.

- See a Doctor: If you know that your spouse has been unfaithful, it's imperative to make an appointment with your doctor, have an examination and be tested for sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). There's no need to be embarrassed as you haven't done anything wrong and are merely protecting yourself and your health, both of which are to be commended. Being a victim of infidelity is bad enough, don't allow yourself to become a victim of an STD as well.

- Take Control: Just because you're the injured party in this dreadful situation doesn't mean you can't take control of the entire thing. Tell your spouse you know what's going on, and, depending on what you've decided, you let them know what's going to happen next, not the other way around.

Remember, you're certainly not alone in this, and regardless of how it may feel today, there is a light at the end of the tunnel!
About the Author
Is your spouse cheating or do you suspect that they're involved with someone else. Don't just stand back, find out how you can successfully deal with this behavior now. Visit http://www.xstilla.com, the number one resource and online divorce forum for people who are dealing with marital issues and needing online divorce support from members who care and want to help.
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