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What You Should Do on A First Date

Aug 17, 2007
You've just met someone you find infinitely interesting. What should you do to get to know them? Choosing an activity for a first date is an important decision. Hopefully, you will have things in common with this person, especially if you are looking for that special one you can spend the rest of your life with. Movies and dinners are classic choices, but sometimes they aren't the best choice.

For instance, if you and the other person are both interested in spiritual matters, there is nothing wrong with attending a religious service together for a first date. If these matters are dear to both your hearts, it will be a welcome relief from the sometimes stressful situation of just taking in entertainment or trying to make conversation.

Of course, that first conversation will need to take place somewhere. Ask your date about themselves to choose a really hand-picked place. For instance, if you share hiking or other outdoor activities, they might enjoy a picnic in a state park followed by a short hike, rather than the traditional dinner date. Being outdoors is relaxed and refreshing. Take a look at the faces of people walking or riding bicycles. They are almost always smiling.

Likewise, find out if the potential date drinks alcohol or not before choosing a night club. In case they don't and you do, or vice versa, you might want to seriously consider whether you want to date this person at all. Is it an important issue to you? If so, you'll probably want to choose someone who shares your views.

While on that first date, you should make it your utmost concern to make that other person comfortable. If you sense that they are unhappy with the atmosphere, suggest some place else to go. If you chose a comedy club, for instance, and they don't seem to be laughing at the jokes, it might be because the jokes are demeaning to women or your date is picking up on something else undesirable. Watch him or her for signs of discomfort and work to relieve the situation.

Dinner dates are always appropriate, but sometimes the conversation lags. If you will be visiting over dinner, think ahead about topics you'd like to discuss with your date. What specific things would you like to know about them? Ask, but don't be nosy if they seem to prefer to be private about some things.

A nice way to break the ice on a first date is to double date with another couple. If there are two other people with you, the conversation is much less likely to lag, and everyone will probably be more comfortable. Choose friends who have a stable relationship, and who like to interact with others. Don't choose friends who monopolize the conversation or who tend to fight with each other, though.

Hopefully, that date will turn out to be a really fun, interesting time of getting to know a really special, fun person. Just remember to treat them like you would want to be treated and find common ground for your relationship.
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