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Two Vital Behavior Keys To Influence Someone's Decision - Thinking and Feeling

Sep 2, 2008
Thinking types make Decisions in a logical and analytical way. Before they commit to and support a Decision, everything about the subject has to be perfectly clear. They prefer to be objective and are somewhat detached, which tends to earn them the label of being impersonal. Thinkers weigh the pros and cons and take a step back to analyze the situation, logically and impersonally, asking themselves if this makes sense and what are the ramifications of the decision. Thinkers objectify the decision.

Feeling types are primarily concerned about the impact their Decisions will have on others. They are concerned with the human and interpersonal aspects and want to be sure the feelings and personal values of others are not in jeopardy. They use friendly persuasion as a tool to get their points across and they make concerted efforts to identify with other people. Feelers place themselves into a situation asking, How do I feel about this? How will it affect me and others? Is this the right thing to do? What are my personal values telling me to do? Feelers personalize the situation.

Thinking types are often impatient with Feeling types need to validate and support each other. Since Thinkers prefer to focus on tasks, the small talk and sharing of personal information in the work setting seems unnecessary or inappropriate to Thinking types. Feeling types enjoy these connections and are more comfortable working with others when trust has been established. They want to know co-workers on a personal level and are more interested in understanding one another. Feeling types offer supportive feedback that can be seen by the Thinking type as insincere and overdone. Feeling types can interpret the frank feedback given by Thinking types as abrupt and critical. Thinking types want to be acknowledged for their accomplishments and need less feedback while Feeling types want to be appreciated for their efforts and like feedback on a regular basis.

In the American population, 50 percent are Thinkers and 50 percent are Feelers. Of the Thinkers, about 65 percent are male, and of the Feelers, 65 percent are women.

Thinking Types in Communication:

Strengths - Does this make sense?
Calm, reasonable, under control
Provide honest and frank feedback
Analyze, evaluate and critique
Objective and principled

Communication Approach
Use logic and analysis to spot flaws
Want to know - why?
List and consider pros and cons
Trust competence and expertise

When Communicating with Thinkers
Be calm, objective and competent
Offer honest feedback and positive comments
Support opinions with logic and clear thinking
Accept critical feedback graciously

Feeling Types in Communication:

Strengths - Will this upset anyone?
Able to empathize and develop rapport
Appreciate others' perspectives
Supportive, nurturing of others
Connect with and create harmony with others

Communication Approach
Focus on subjective beliefs and values
Share personal stories and examples
Want to get to know someone personally
Like collaboration and want to cooperate

When Communicating with Feelers
Listen first before evaluating and critiquing
Focus on people and find out what is valued
Acknowledge - do not analyze others' values
Focus on creating win-win situations
About the Author
Pamela Hollister, Author, INTJ, The PEOPLE Process
Understanding People is what it's all about. Personality type training products everyone can use.
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