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Helping A Friend Through A Breakup

Sep 9, 2008
Breaking up is hard to do, and sometimes it is just as hard when a close friend is going through a breakup. It can be difficult to watch your friend suffer emotionally and not really know what to do.

In fact, sometimes watching someone who you care about go through a breakup is almost as painful as going through a breakup yourself. There are some things that you can do to help your friend get past the breakup and get both of you back to living life and having fun!

Moving Past the Pain

The best thing you can do for the first couple weeks after a breakup is just listen. Don't offer any advice, don't talk badly about the person that they have broken up with, just listen. Let your friend know that you care and that you want to help them get through this, but try to keep things as positive as possible while allowing your friend to go through the motions.

After a couple weeks have gone by, try to get your friend to get out of the house for more than just work or school. Ask them to go to breakfast, then work up to lunch, dinner, and then ask them to go out with you one night. Don't push the idea of meeting someone new, just have it be under the pretense that you want to spend time with them and you have something great in mind. Don't bring up being single or anything like that, take the focus off of their relationship status and just party it up and have a good time!

A few weeks after this your friend should stop talking so much about their ex, you may even notice that they are coming to terms with the breakup and are talking about their future without their ex. This is a good thing. If you notice that your friend is still weepy every time they think of their ex and they aren't able to get out of bed, it is important for you to encourage them to seek help. Sometimes some people just need a little bit of emotional support from a professional to move past a relationship, and tell your friend that there is no shame in that.

The best thing you can do as a friend is to let them know that you care, but to stay neutral. Do not talk bad about the ex, as this always works out terribly in the end. If you talk bad about the ex and they get back together then you will become the friend who doesn't like their mate. If you talk bad about their ex and they don't get back together then you are always the go to guy, the person who knows why it all went wrong, and you don't want to have that on your shoulders, either.
About the Author
Rodrigo Rehn is a Relationships Expert, Linux Systems Administrator, Web Programmer, PHP Developer and CEO of FaceRomance dating services.
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