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Why Some People Are Ready To Date Before Others

Aug 17, 2007
Everyone is ready to start dating at a different age. There is no golden age, it's a personal choice that's weighted on certain factors such as maturity, experience with the opposite sex and life experience.

If a person's getting a slow start, it's a good idea to investigate the reason why a particular individual is slow to get started dating. Is he shy and bashful? Then maybe he needs encouragement in getting social experience; maybe he or she needs to be drawn into a group activity as a starter.

Is the person an outsider because of interests and dreams that are not shared by his contemporaries? Then he needs further to develop his unique personality, confident that congenial companions will be available beyond high school or even college.

Some young people have been so hurt in the process of growing up that they may need special help to straighten out. They must be made to realize that they have within them the potentialities of becoming wholesome, happy persons. Special counselors, psychological services, and guidance facilities, can help this kind of unhappy young person; and those who are concerned with his happiness should be carefully guide him in that direction.

What about those that are too ready to date?

Frequently girls are ready for dates long before others of their age and grade are. These are the girls who grow up fast, and before they're out of grade school are taller or more physically mature than others in their class. They become interested in boys at a time when fellows their own age are not even aware that girls exist, in a special personal sense.

Because the early developing girl is tall for her age, it is hard for her to find a boy taller than she is and still within the range of those considered datable by her family. Parents often object to a girl's dating older boys, for they know that although she looks grown-up, she actually is too inexperienced.

To handle the complicated situations that might arise with an older fellow. Yet the boys of her own age are still "little guys" both literally and socially. So the early maturing girl is expected to "freeze" where she is until others of her age catch up with her.

The fact is that at junior high school age, girls are taller than the majority of boys. Lamentably, at dancing classes , group dates, or boy-girl parties, the tall girl who is big for her age is avoided by shorter fellows. So she, more ready to date than most, is more frequently delayed in the very social experiences, such as dancing lesions, that would ready her for dating when it finally does come. This problem is accentuated in our country because exaggerated emphasis is put on the importance of a boy being taller than a girl.

There are many particularly well-adjusted girls who weather this handicap quite nicely. They become natural leaders to whom other girls and boys turn. They take the initiative in social affairs and help others have a good time. Buy the time pairing off begins, and the fellows are beginning to shoot up in height, such early maturing girls come into their own time developed some special skills in group activities, such as running a party or playing a musical instrument, or have found themselves a place in sports or drama.
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