Home » Arts and Entertainment » Humor

Is This Another Fish Story?

Aug 17, 2007
Sushi is so popular in Southern California the local bar is likely a sushi bar. However, the farther sushi is from the ocean, the less popular it is.

If you think sushi belongs in an aquarium, concentrate on the rice - not the raw fish - when you try it.

Without the rice it's called sashimi. Don't try sashimi unless you convince yourself it's what Japanese eat to stay thin.

Basically, sushi is a combination of protein and carbohydrate. If your mother told you a meal had to include a vegetable, order cucumber roll.

If you want a taste of LA, order California roll. Not only is the crab cooked, it's rolled with avocado.

A roll is cut in six pieces. Four rolls would be enough for dinner. Do not save room expecting a Tootsie Roll for dessert.

The harmless looking dab of green paste on the plate is wasabi. It's not harmless - it's horseradish. Wasabi can kick the ass of kick-ass chili.

The little, beige mound next to the wasabi is pickled ginger. The coolness of ginger is meant to balance the heat of wasabi. If putting cold water on a burn works for you, maybe this will too.

Little dishes of soy sauce accompany the sushi. Soy sauce is liquid salt.

Because sushi is an acquired taste, start with mild fish, like tuna and sea bass. Because my husband is an advanced sushi eater, he eats eel, sea urchin and fried shrimp heads. I'm not advanced. I look at the sushi chefs when John eats those things.

Sushi chefs are performers with sharp knives. They want you to eat what they make immediately. Some think it's because they want you to eat sushi at its freshest.

I think it's because they want you to forget how much sushi you've eaten and order more. I think sushi chefs are salesmen - who perform with sharp knives.

If you want to be a sushi waiter - not the kind with a tray - the kind who waits for all the sushi to be served before eating, you might have to remind the chef of an old Japanese proverb. "The customer is always right - except when using chopsticks".

Rubbing two sticks together to make fire can be easier than using chopsticks. If you lose control of a piece of sushi, casually stuff the whole thing in your mouth - and that's saying a mouthful!
About the Author
KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life.
Take a minute to make yourself smile at
http://knightwatch.typepad.com
Rating:
Please Rate:
(Average: Not rated)
Views: 163
Print Email Report Share
Article Categories
    • Classic Cars
    • Motorcycles
    • Recreational Vehicles
    • SUVs
    • Trucks
    • Vans
    • Branding
    • Business Opportunities
    • Careers and Jobs
    • Corporate
    • Customer Service
    • Direct Mail
    • Entrepreneurship
    • Ethics
    • Financing
    • Franchising
    • Home-Based Business
    • Human Resources
    • Import and Export
    • Leadership
    • Management
    • Market Research
    • Marketing and Advertising
    • Negotiation
    • Network Marketing
    • Networking
    • Organizational
    • Presentation
    • Project Management
    • Public Relations
    • Small Business
    • Strategic Planning
    • Team Building
    • Telemarketing
    • Training
    • Data Recovery
    • Databases
    • Games
    • Hardware
    • Networks
    • Operating Systems
    • Programming
    • Security
    • Software
    • Spyware and Viruses
    • Ask an Expert
    • College and University
    • Home Schooling
    • K-12
    • Languages
    • Online Education
    • Psychology
    • Accounting
    • Credit
    • Currency Trading
    • Debt Consolidation
    • Insurance
    • Investing
    • Leasing
    • Loans
    • Mortgage
    • Mutual Funds
    • Personal Finance
    • Stock Market
    • Structured Settlements
    • Taxes
    • Wealth Building
    • Coffee
    • Cooking
    • Gourmet
    • Recipes
    • Wine and Spirits
    • Acne
    • Aerobics
    • Alternative Medicine
    • Beauty
    • Cancer
    • Cosmetics
    • Depression
    • Diabetes
    • Diseases and Conditions
    • Fitness Equipment
    • Fitness
    • Hair Loss
    • Heart Disease
    • Medicine
    • Men's Health
    • Muscle Building
    • Nutrition
    • Skin Care
    • Supplements and Vitamins
    • Weight Loss
    • Women's Health
    • Yoga
    • Arts and Crafts
    • Babies
    • Collecting
    • Elderly Care
    • Genealogy
    • Hobbies
    • Parenting
    • Pets
    • Pregnancy
    • Woodworking
    • Feng Shui
    • Gardening
    • Home Appliances
    • Home Security
    • Interior Design
    • Landscaping
    • Affiliate Programs
    • Article Marketing
    • Auctions
    • Audio
    • Banner Advertising
    • Blogging
    • Broadband
    • Domain Names
    • E-Books
    • E-Commerce
    • Email Marketing
    • Ezines and Newsletters
    • Forums
    • Internet Marketing
    • Link Popularity
    • Pay-Per-Click
    • Podcasting
    • RSS
    • Search Engine Marketing
    • Search Engine Optimization
    • Security
    • Social Media
    • Spam
    • Video
    • Viral Marketing
    • Web Design
    • Web Development
    • Web Hosting
    • Copyright
    • Cyber Law
    • Intellectual Property
    • National, State, Local
    • Patents
    • Regulatory Compliance
    • Trademarks
    • Buying
    • Selling
    • Baseball
    • Basketball
    • Boating
    • Cycling
    • Extreme Sports
    • Fishing
    • Football
    • Golf
    • Hockey
    • Hunting
    • Martial Arts
    • Running
    • Scuba Diving
    • Soccer
    • Swimming
    • Tennis
    • Dating
    • Divorce
    • Marriage
    • Weddings
    • Astrology
    • Buddhism
    • Christianity
    • Faith
    • Hinduism
    • Islam
    • Judaism
    • Meditation
    • Metaphysical
    • New Age
    • Cable and Satellite TV
    • Cell Phones
    • Communication
    • Gadgets and Gizmos
    • GPS
    • Satellite Radio
    • Video Conferencing
    • VoIP
    • Addictions
    • Coaching
    • Goal Setting
    • Motivational
    • Stress Management
    • Time Management
    • Clothing
    • Electronics
    • Fashion
    • Gifts
    • Jewelry
    • Causes and Organizations
    • Environment
    • History
    • Holidays
    • Men's Issues
    • Nature
    • Philosophy
    • Politics
    • Women's Issues
    • World Affairs
    • Air Travel
    • Camping
    • Cruises
    • Destinations
    • Outdoors
    • Article Writing
    • Book Reviews
    • Copywriting
    • Fiction
    • Non-Fiction
    • Poetry
    • Quotes
    • Screenplay
    • Tools and Resources