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Dating for Shy Singles

Aug 18, 2007
Shyness can make dating very difficult. Sometimes shy people are mistakenly taken for arrogant, unfriendly or some other negative observation. That is why it is very important for people who are shy to work on tips and tricks to help them out.

There are several reasons for shy individuals ranging from genetical inclination to low self esteem or other problems. No matter what the issue there are positive steps that can be taken to ensure a more confident and successful dating experience.

1. Face Fear Itself

Many individuals that are shy suffer from a wounded self esteem or confidence level. In most cases there is a reason for this, but sometimes the individual is either not honest with themselves or have choosen to ignore the situation. The first step is to determine what the problem is. What is causing the lack or confidence or shyness? Is it appearance, personality, or a negative relationship in the past? In many cases the person knows exactly what the problem is, but has failed to deal with it. So face the problem, admit it and then figure out how to fix it.

When you are dating if you are shy the road to a successful relationship is much more difficult. Those that are shy are generally quieter so it is more difficult for others to get to know them. After discovering the source of problems or areas that need work, the person can then move forward. Remember you can not change what you do not acknowledge.

2. Do Not Ignore It

Ignoring the fact that you have had relationship problems because of shyness or lack of confidence is not a good thing. Do you realize that others can pick up on this problem and it really can do damage to any dating relationship. Some people believe that they can hide this fact by acting like something that they are not. What typically happens is they end up embarrassing themselves because they are trying so hard to be something that they are not. Even if you continue being something that you are not, eventually it will get tiring and you will want to be yourself. People can only act for so long, making it best to resolve the problem rather than trying to hide it.

3. Relax

During a dating experience or any other social encounter remember to relax. If you feel yourself getting nervous, take a deep breath and think before you speak. When people have been shy all their life they are usually self confident about their shortcoming. Do not worry so much about saying the wrong thing, no one is monitoring your every word so relax. Everyone gets nervous, but you have to realize that while you are worrying about your comments the other person is worried about their teeth, hair or something else. That is the truth, everyone fears something when they are on a date with someone that they are interested in. Granted this does not make it easier when you are sitting across from someone and fearing that you will say or do something wrong. But, if you can employ the correct relaxation with the tips and tricks learned by reading a self help book or attending classes you are sure to have a pleasant dating experience.

Shyness is difficult, but it does not have to mean that a relationship is not possible. Finding the positives about yourself and learning to appreciate these positives will help tremendously. Everyone has things that they would rather change about themselves. This is possible with the correct information and guts to change it. There is a ton of information on the internet about overcoming shyness.

Books, classes and counseling are all other great ways to find new ideas to help you with shyness as well as relationships with others.
About the Author
Lee Blackspur is the owner of http://www.My-Dating-Advice.com which provides free online and offline dating tips, advice and articles for men, women and teens of all ages and experience.
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