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What is the Perfect Dating Formula?

Aug 18, 2007
Is there such a thing as a perfect dating formula? And if there is, does it apply to all dates? The problem with the question here is the word 'perfect'. In setting anything up as being 'perfect' you are immediately raising the expectation to a level that's impossible to meet. Instead of thinking about perfect, consider the formula for a great date -- and then you're getting closer to the realms of possibility.

As all people are different, and everyone has their own idea of what makes for a great date, the formula can't be specific. However there are certain staples that make for a generic one-size-fits-all formula. First of all, the person you are taking on the date must be attractive to you. This doesn't necessarily mean that they look like a movie star, or super model, but rather that there's something about them physically and emotionally that attracts you to them. Next there needs to be something about you that attracts to you. It's possible to have a great time with friends, but for it to be a 'date' there has to be that mutual attraction spark!

Having discovered that you are attracted to someone who finds you attractive, you then need to set up the date itself. While a romantic meal for two in an exclusive restaurant might be the romance writer's choice, it doesn't necessary follow that this will work for all couples. Instead of going with what's 'done', think about what you and your date love to do. Is there something that you both enjoy? Are you both city people who love museums, or are you country lovers who love hiking? Are you sporty types, theatre goers or roller coaster riders? Plan your date so that you have some form of activity that you can both enjoy, and which includes a meal. The meal should fit with the date -- for example, a picnic fits with a hike, a restaurant meal fits with the theatre, and hot dogs sound great at a theme park!

On the date don't stress about what could go wrong. It's not your responsibility to make everything good. It's your responsibility to have a great time so that your partner doesn't feel that they have to be impressed by your attempt to be impressive! Relax and enjoy yourself in the company of your date. Be natural, and allow your date to do the same. That way you'll both stop thinking about impressing the other, and will start to enjoy the date instead.

Put this together and the generic formula is:

Mutual attraction + shared interest activity + food + relax and enjoy yourself = a great date!
About the Author
Jane Saeman runs a site called along with info on dating and relationship on her blog at at http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com/blog2
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