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Talking to People Made Easy

Aug 17, 2007
Have you ever noticed how personalities with 'people skills' just seem to naturally radiate a positive energy which makes talking to people absolutely easy for them? In parties or in bars, you will see 'people magnets', or those who make a crowd gather around them because their personality or what they have to say proves to be irresistible to a lot of people.

The skill of having the affinity of talking to people does not need to be an innate quality, it can also be an acquired or developed skill. If the thought of approaching a total stranger or talking in front of a group of people is enough to make you sweat, then you need to take steps into honing your skills so that it will be easier for you to talk to people. Here are some tips on how you can develop your conversational and your 'people' skills:

1. Make sure to address any self-confidence issues that you have.

If you are feeling insecure about your appearance, or your personality as a whole, then you will never gain enough confidence to stand up and talk before a group of people. By gaining enough self-confidence, you will learn how to stand up and believe in yourself and be secure enough to voice out your opinions without fear of being ridiculed.

More often than not, it is your own insecurities which restrict you from engaging in a spontaneous conversation with other people - which is not a very good thing, because if you limit yourself to
interacting with a limited number of friends, then you may never fully realize your potential as a person - or even as a leader.

2. When talking to other people, a little smile and a lot of honesty goes a long way.

You may be surprised at the number of friends that you will gain once you smile more often and be more open with the conversations that you have with other people. By being more open and friendly, you are actually trying to reach out to them and from there, the conversation will flow more freely, making it easier for them to talk to you.

Also, people respond positively to sincerity and honesty. By giving a little more of yourself to others, you will find not only feel better about yourself, but you can also start building better relationships with the people around you - be it a long-time neighbor, a new acquaintance or a prospective relationship.

3. Look for a common ground in the course of your conversation.

If you have exhausted the weather as the topic of your conversation, there are a lot of other things that you can talk about. Tourist attractions in nearby areas, family background, film, music and books are examples of subjects that you can discuss when talking with other people. There are some who gets uncomfortable speaking about their family or private lives so it is good to keep the conversation around light or mundane topics.

The important thing is that during the course
of your conversation, look for 'clues' about what makes the other person respond positively. If they look alert and interested when you are talking about film, then you can turn this into your common ground and the conversation should flow freely and spontaneously
from there.

Finally, being polite, responsive and learning how to gauge other people's reactions are all essential when it comes to talking to people. A good conversation keeps your juices flowing, and what better way is there to pass the time and make friends than by engaging in a
friendly tete-a-tete?
About the Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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