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How to Build Self Esteem in Children

Aug 17, 2007
Every parent has to learn how to build self esteem in their child. You might think that children do not have a problem with low self esteem but some of them do - and that someone could easily be your child.

How does one build self esteem in their child? You may rely on the following steps to guide you through the process:

1. It is important to foster a sense of connection with the child to improve his sense of self worth. Parents who do not take the time to talk to their child in loving terms and even cradling their child will find that their child will most likely have low self-esteem as a result. To solve this problem, you should set aside time for bonding with your child - this sends the message to your child that he is worth your while.

2. Create opportunities for your child to participate in family, school, and community activities. When he is allowed to be involved in these groups, he is made to feel like he belongs which drives up his self esteem.

3. Direct teaching, guided practice and modeling are ways for your child to learn appropriate conversational and social skills early in life. This is important so that he can learn how to work and live with other people.

4. Sharing with your child anecdotes about the elders and ancestors of his family, and try to make him feel proud of his heritage and nationality. This gives him a sense that his lineage is a valuable part of him.

5. Look for every opportunity to make your child feel that he is a unique person by showing him that he possesses special qualities and talents that make him stand out among his peers. Every child wants to feel that he is not a run-of-the-mill person, that he was made differently in some way.

6. Allow your child to develop his own ways of expressing himself. Respect any thoughts and feelings that he may eventually express - these make up a valuable part of his personality.

7. Permit your child to satisfy his curiosity, imagination, and creativity through daily learning experiences. Even if you have to guide him through such experiences, it is important that he take the initiative to learn about the world around him. This sets the foundation for more advanced learning opportunities in the future when he is an independent adult.

8. Nurture a sense of power in your child by giving him opportunities to succeed in his many fields of endeavor. This may mean taking a step back sometimes and letting him reach his goals on his own, but it will be worth it because your child will gain more self-confidence as a result.

9. Let your child take responsibility for certain tasks in the family. Even a mundane chore like taking out the garbage bin everyday will contribute to his sense of responsibility.

10. The child should have a chance to practice any new skills he learns. Your child should learn to analyze why he fails at a certain task, and how he can change the outcome next time. This entails setting doable standards for himself so that he has the opportunity to succeed.

11. Skills in problem solving and decision making can be inculcated in your child at an early age. He must learn how to prioritize, anticipate consequences, and determine the right plan of action for any project he undertakes.

12. Be a good role model to your child - remember, children learn by copying the behavior of other people, particularly their immediate elders. If you dictate one mode of behavior but act in another way, that just confuses the child.

13. Impart a stable value system in your child so that he will be able to discern right from wrong even at a young age.

All these tips should help you learn how to build self esteem in your child.
About the Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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