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Self Esteem Help in 5 Easy Steps

Aug 18, 2007
Are you looking for self esteem help? Before you go around seeking such help, you should be aware of the difference between normal self esteem and low self esteem. Everyone goes through periods in their daily life when they experience feeling the blues which may then be replaced by a high - all in the same day. But people who have normal self esteem are able to cope with these fluctuations without getting really, really down.

On the other hand, a person with poor self esteem is easily brought low by anything that happens during his day - a dirty look from a restaurant waittress, criticism from a superior, not picking a winning lottery number.

If you feel you are a person with poor self esteem, then you could do with some self esteem help. A person with low self esteem generally depends on external factors to boost their self esteem - things like grades in school, performance evaluations at the office, and following the latest hairstyles are all things that type of person needs to feel better about himself. This is because without such positive external reinforcement, the person listens to his feelings of poor self worth instead.

A person with low self esteem can rely on these steps to improve his feelings of self worth:

1. Contradict your inner critic. The inner critic is the internal voice that gives unfairly harsh assessments of the individual. It provides unrealistic generalizations that the person has to live up to. This inner critic is known to be illogical at times, making it seem that the circumstances of the person are worse than they really are.

You contradict your inner critic by offering alternative and more positive ways of examining the situation. This may take practice but do not worry - in time, you will learn to adopt a more positive mind set through a daily routine of contradicting that inner voice.

2. Be more self-nurturing. This means treating yourself more like you are a valuable human being who has intrinsic self worth, than someone who should be treated like garbage. Developing better self esteem starts with this because if you do not treat yourself like a valuable person, even positive input from other people will only have a temporary effect. Once you forget the positive input you received, your feelings of poor self worth will kick in again and your day will be ruined.

3. Try to take better care of yourself physically. Get enough sleep at night (this may vary from person to person.) Consume proper nutrition and watch your diet. Exercise right. Observe proper hygiene. You may be surprised but a person with low self esteem can usually be discerned by how they let themselves go physically. They may appear bedraggled and grubby, with clothes that have not been washed, hair that has not been combed, and teeth that badly need brushing. The physical appearance is usually the first to suffer.

4. When you are able to accomplish something significant, do something nice for yourself. This may mean getting a much-needed massage, or a relaxing pedicure. You could go shopping for neat clothes at your local mall, or you might just want an ice cream cone or slice of cake to savor your success. The point is to prove to yourself that you deserve to enjoy your success too.

5. Learn to be forgiving to yourself. Many people with self esteem issues beat themselves up mentally and psychologically over even the smallest mistake. Such people tell themselves: I am so dumb! That was the stupidest thing I could ever have done! I will never be able to get it right! A person with normal self esteem can discern between an honest mistake and habitual mistakes.

If these tips fail to eliminate your feelings of poor self esteem, you might want to consult a counselor or psychologist instead for higher quality of self esteem help.
About the Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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