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Are They Stories Or Lessons?

Aug 18, 2007
Once upon a time there was a little girl named Goldilocks. When I was a little girl, this was just a bedtime story. As an adult, I can read the lesson between the lines. Picky people are hard to bear.

When I heard the story of "Cinderella", I wanted glass slippers. Now I would need the slippers in size eight and a half. If I tried to squeeze my feet into eights, I'd undoubtedly shatter my dreams about Prince Charming. "If the shoe fits, wear it" is "Cinderella's" lesson.

As a child, I saw "Snow White" as proof an apple wasn't as healthy as my mother said it was. Today, however, I'm wondering if the apple cured Snow White's morning breath.

Sleeping Beauty slept one hundred years without an apple and without overcoming her prince with morning breath when he kissed her awake. I don't want to sleep a hundred years, but I'd gladly prick my finger on a needle instead of a spindle if I could have a long nap. I'd even settle for being awakened by my dog licking me.

Then there's the story of Rapunzel, who got locked in a tower. Little girl me thought this was a romantic story about a prince climbing up Rapunzel's hair to rescue her. Now I see the Prince for what he was - a social climber.

"Little Red Riding Hood" wouldn't make it as a children's story today. A girl walking through the woods alone would be politically incorrect. Besides, what girl today has a grandmother with very big eyes and ears? Grandmothers today have plastic surgeons.

Most of the stories of my childhood were about females; but when I think about Hansel and Gretel, I realize they wouldn't have gotten lost in the forest if Hansel had asked for directions.

"Jack and the Beanstalk" was about a boy; but as a grown woman, I see it as real life lessons. The giant wasn't really a giant. He was height challenged. If a girl tried to climb the beanstalk, she'd hit her head on the glass ceiling; and in today's gold market the golden hen would lay a smaller egg.

My favorite story as a child was "The Little Engine That Could". It fed my genetic predisposition to be compulsive. Of course, today I don't want to be like the Little Engine. I don't want to be over the hill.
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KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life.
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