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Affirmations Are Lies

Aug 18, 2007
Affirmations are basically lies. They are statements of the things that you are, that you do, or that you have that you don't believe. You don't believe them because they're not true, but you wish they were true.

Although many programs for working with affirmations would have you believe that repeating these lies over and over again will make your subconscious mind believe that they're true, I don't find this approach very helpful.

I think it's far more useful to use the statement as a catalyst to help you learn about your personal blocks to making those statements true for you. Once you know what the problems are, it's much easier to take steps to resolve them. Once the problems are resolved then you can actually create those statements as the realities.

There are many lists of ways to create affirmations effectively. They generally cover the following points:

1. Affirmations are personal. They start with the words, "I am..." Or "I have..." Or "It's easy for me to... (Do something that's now difficult.)"
2. They are focused on changing something in me not on changing something in the outside world.
3. They are positive statements of what it would be like if you didn't have a particular problem.
4. They are written in the present tense even though they are not true yet in the present tense. (That's why they seem like lies.)
5. They use action words that trigger emotion or feeling.
6. They work most effectively when they are accompanied by vividly images that the statement you're making is true.

One of the most powerful ways I know of to work with affirmations is to write them over and over again. However each time you write an affirmation once, you stop and pay attention to any thoughts or feelings you're having at the moment.

These thoughts and feelings often show up as tension in some part of your body or as a voice in your mind telling you that the affirmation is false. Once you are clear on what your response is, write that down also.

Then repeat the process. Write the affirmation, check your response, and write your response. Keep doing this for a certain amount of time, perhaps 15 minutes, or until your page is filled up, or until you feel positive or happy when you check in with your response to the affirmation.

Repeat the process every day for a week or so. By that time you should have a good idea of what you need to do next.
About the Author
Communicate skillfully about sensitive subjects in business situations. Have the challenging conversations that lead to cooperation and success. http://www.DareToSayIt.com/blog
Laurie Weiss, Ph.D. is a Master Certified Coach and communication expert. Dr. Weiss has spent 35 years helping clients resolve conflict in business and personal relationships. Email feedback@laurieweiss.com
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