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How to Overcome Shyness One Step at a Time

Aug 18, 2007
If you are facing social anxiety or shyness, here are some helpful tips that may give you a better chance in overcoming it. Try to come out of hiding and be more courageous in facing your fears.

Steps to overcome social anxiety:

First, you have to make sure of yourself that you are committed and willing enough to undergo the process of conquering your phobia. This is not simple, due to your fear of being humiliated. But that is just the fear sticking in your mind. Convince yourself that you can undertake this simple task.

Note down stuff that make you feel uncomfortable, like certain situations or people - perhaps strangers do this to you. Try visualizing over and over being in such situations or with those people until you have managed to convince yourself that there is nothing to be afraid of.

The next time you see the people you are uncomfortable with, try and manage to say just even a simple greeting or simply acknowledge how they look. The more you give a positive impression, the more confidence you will build up for yourself.

In situations that you are not comfortable with, try to remember them and record them in your thoughts. In this way, you can sort of playback the things that went wrong or what makes you uncomfortable in that situation - until finally you will catch your reactions so you can correct them.

Relaxing is a big help in conquering social anxiety, even if it might seem a little strange. Relaxing your mind will give you a clearer outlook on scenarios and situations that you are afraid of. Relax your muscles and stop your uncontrollable trembling and unwanted movements. Relaxing your breath so that your heartbeat will be controlled too also helps. Sometimes when you are in a situation you are not comfortable with, you might start by breathing heavily, kind of like panting or labored breathing. Repeating this over and over again will help you achieve your goal of a desired level of socializing.

We all know that this is a very hard process, but believing in your self will make the process lighter and more possible to overcome. Not giving up what you believe in will eventually work. Try not to look on your mistakes with frustration.

If a bad conversation might result from your efforts, at least look on the positive side, that you at least made an effort to converse with people. Counting even the slightest success and learning to examine what turned out wrong will give you a more optimistic outlook.

Once you have gone through these procedures, repeat them again and again and you will notice how easy it is the next time around. And as it becomes easier and easier, it means that you have overcome your social anxiety.

It will really take a lot of work, self confidence, positive thinking, a lot of guts and a lot of practice to undergo these steps. But this is a lot easier than being locked up with your phobia until you get older and older. If you just leave it alone, it becomes harder to beat.

There is always hope to overcome shyness. Believing alone will not take you there, but exercising what you believe in will lead you to success.
About the Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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