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How to Deal with Shyness - 3 Secrets for Success

Aug 18, 2007
If you do not know how to deal with shyness, your attitude may be misinterpreted as a sign of rudeness or a lack of interest. For example, if you are in the company of a friend's friend and you hardly speak at all, it may be taken as a sign that you do not want to talk to them. If your friend runs to your defense and says that you are "just shy", then that is the only time that other people will understand.

What if there is no other friend to defend your attitude? For this reason, you should know how to deal with shyness and take steps towards slowly climbing your way up in getting over it. Much like a lifelong disease, you may not completely overcome shyness that is why you should know how to deal with it and live a full life despite having this feeling. Take a look at these tips on how to deal with shyness:

1. Be comfortable with who you are

One of the main causes of shyness is feeling insecure about one's self. All fears should be conquered from the inside. Shyness is a fear of speaking in front of a group of people out of fear of being embarrassed that is why you need to be comfortable with who you are first. Once you have a total acceptance of who you are as a person, other people will react to your renewed sense of self-confidence. In turn, once you have enough self-confidence, you will feel more comfortable facing other people in any given social situation.

2. Identify your strengths and use them as a foundation to boost your self-esteem.

In life, we try to compensate for the things that that we lack by making up for it in other ways. The same thing holds true in overcoming shyness. If you feel that shyness is negative quality that you just cannot seem to do anything about, then make up for it in other ways. It is important to determine your strengths and weaknesses. So you know that you are painfully shy.

Take a look at the other side of the coin. What are your strengths and what makes you a unique character? Shyness cannot be the entire aspect of your being. Once you have pinpointed your strengths, you can build them up and in turn, you can boost your self-esteem. This way, you can feel a lot better once you are in the company of others because you know that there is nothing to be insecure about since you do have plus points on your side.

3. Remember that overcoming shyness is a slow process but if you continually work on it, you can certainly achieve your goal.

Shyness cannot be cured or overcome in a span of one night, or even a week or a month. It is a tedious, slow and sometimes painful process. However, much like conquering your fear, you can never completely get over your shyness if you do not do anything about it. Take it one step at a time. Start by being more open to conversation with people that you often meet.

If you do not normally chat with the grocer on the store that you always go to, try doing so now. If you often lounge in your apartment on a Friday night, try going out with your friends for a change. Take exercise classes, self-development classes, join a sport that you have always wanted to try. Letting yourself adapt to a new environment will make you meet a lot of people who will help you get over your shyness eventually.

These tips on how to deal with shyness are sure-fire ways on how you can overcome shyness so that you can live a fuller life filled with experiences from all the wonderful people that you can meet.
About the Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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