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How Effective Listening Is Important In A Relationship

Aug 18, 2007
Every relationship has its ups and downs and you would be in for a shock if you believed that your relationship was a never-ending fantasy ride. There are times when nothing seems to be working and you may often wonder why you fell in love with this person who seems so distant now. During troubled times in a relationship, the first thing that gets affected is communication. Its the time when either partner feels that the other is being unreasonable. This leads to little or no communication between the two. If you feel that you are having a strained relationship with your partner, dont let communication die between you. Its probably the only way that you may be able to get your relation on track. Counselors lay a lot of emphasis on communication and regard it as an effective way of resolving issues involved in a relationship.

Listen to what your partner has got to say

One way to salvage your relationship and stop communication from becoming a problem is to patiently listen to what your partner has to say. You may not agree with everything your partner says, but the very fact that you are listening will take off the stress to a great extent. It would be comforting for your partner to know that you still care and that his/her views and opinions still matter to you.

Become a good listener

Just like talking, listening is also an art and needs some practice. You dont have to listen to your partner just for the heck of it, but convince your partner that you are following every word of what is being said. Its very common in troubled relationships to contradict every damn thing your partner is saying and retaliate with your views. One thing you need to remember here is that this is not some high school debate wherein you are going to win points and there can be only one winner. This is your life and everything that you say will take a toll on your relationship. This is the time when you need to be sensitive so that your relationship has a smooth sailing.

Mind your body language

You need to be extremely careful about your body language and make sure that you dont distract your partner. Its important to maintain an eye contact so that your partner knows that you want to listen with full concentration. This is not the best time to complete your household chores as you talk. Avoid unnecessary gestures that may give out a wrong message and annoy your partner. Be sympathetic and if you feel your partner is feeling very low, reach out to show that you understand how difficult it is. Simple gestures like holding hands can go a long way in convincing your partner about your true love and how dependable you are in trying times.

During the conversation, make an effort to trace any hidden emotional tone to know exactly what your partner is going through. Sometimes, a tone expresses a lot of things that may not have been actually said. If you manage to understand these tone variations, you would be a lot more successful in understanding your partner, resolve personal issues and taking your relationship in the right direction.
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