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Still Have Growing Pains?

Aug 18, 2007
How do you know when you're grown up? Is it when people stop asking you what you want to be? One of the first things I wanted to be was an only child - no hand-me-down's, no sharing, no comparing, no competition.Then I realized if I didn't have siblings, I wouldn't have anyone to share the blame.

From the age of ten I wanted to be a writer. I wrote the wordiest essays in fifth grade, which inspired my teacher to teach me about editing. The next thing I wanted to be was grown up; and when I was a teenager, I was sure I'd accomplished that.

Although I'd stopped expecting Prince Charming to rescue me from dragons a long time before, in my twenties I wanted him to rescue me from my life. Who knew Prince Charming would have his own problems? Who knew glass slippers could cause bunions?

Next I wanted to be a mother, so I read books - lots of books. Pick the baby up when he cries because a baby can never have too much love or don't pick the baby up because you'll spoil him. A slap on the hand teaches a toddler not to touch the stove; but no, slapping is physical abuse. Working teaches teenagers responsibility, but being a teenager is enough work.

The only rule I was sure about as a mother was the Golden Rule. Maybe one of life's rules is to keep growing up - to keep following your heart. No, I could follow my heart forever; but I'd never be a singer. I can't lift my voice two octaves, which explains why I can't carry a tune. Sometimes wanting isn't enough. In fact, I think my husband enclosed our shower because of my singing.

When I was a child and said I wanted something, my grandmother would ask what I'd trade to have it in my next life. I could trade a few IQ points without walking into walls. I could trade an inch of height and wear higher heels. I wonder if I could trade being a blond even though I'm not really one. No, if I came back as a singer, I'd be a sewing machine.

What it comes down to is I don't want to grow up. I want to keep growing by trying new things. I want to be Peter Pan and I want to fly!
About the Author
KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life.
Take a minute to make yourself smile at
http://knightwatch.typepad.com
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