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Become Good At Problem Solving.It Could Save Your Marriage

Aug 24, 2007
Who wants to know about problems? Of course, nobody does. Problems are troublesome, tedious and they destroy relationships. We have spent our lives learning and employing evasive coping strategies, often using incredible creativity and imagination in the process. In short, we will do anything to avoid problems, if we can. This is all very well and good.

Viewed purely superficially, those techniques might delude us and our partners for a while into believing that we have succeeded in making the problem go away. Better still, we may even have tricked our minds to believe that the problem does not exist in the first place. Such strategies seldom get the desired results, actually, more often then not, a postponed problem often is worse, when it finally raises its ugly head above the parapet again.

The proverbial mole hill becomes a mountain when niggly, small matters are blown out of proportion and a crisis of magnitude unfolds before you know what has hit you.

All relationships will encounter problems sooner or later. Such is the nature of our existence and good problem solving techniques are the way to move forward and assure lasting happiness in our relationships. If you value the long term prospects of your marriage you might like to consider a strategy that will help you to solve problems with ease as soon as they arise, rather then sweeping them under the carpet. Becoming good at problem solving enables you to lead a happier live and reduce stress to a minimum. Your relationship will blossom as a result, allowing you to spend more time enjoying your partner and the things you both share together.

When clients come to me complaining about their unresolved problems, blaming their other half for being unsupportive or insensitive. unnecessary tension is created in the relationship, simply because they are inept at effective problem solving. This need not be so though, because problem solving can be learned.

The first thing I always show my clients, is how their own negative thinking not only exacerbates any problem they believe they have but, how just thinking negative thoughts makes them feel bad. This basic home truth applies to everyone. Once you are in this negative state it is very difficult to see a way out of any challenging situation. The easiest way out seems to be blaming those nearest to us, namely our spouses.

The longer you remain in emotional states like anger, sadness, overwhelm or fear, your emotions become self fulfilling prophesies, as you unconsciously adopt behaviours to prove how bad you are feeling. This in turn creates yet more negative and limiting thinking, concluding the negative circle. By now you are trapped in your own negativity, making it twice as hard to resolve any problems and challenges. This, needless to say, creates more stress and disharmony in your marriage.

Energy Therapy uses energy, the basic building block of everything in existence, including our thoughts, to address emotional and physical challenges. When we feel low, the radiant energies in our bodies are low. The body's meridians are tight, constricting the amount of energy that can flow through them. Mind and body become starved of blood and oxygen supply, making us feel moody, sluggish and, well, simply unwell. In this state you are hardly in a position to think clearly, or solve problems easily.

Learning to unlock the free flow of energy is key to clearing body and mind and ultimately problem solving. You can do this by learning EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique, a very powerful and simple energy technique. EFT focuses the mind on a specific problem, anger for example. Whilst you focus on your issue you simultaneously tap on a small number of meridian points on body and face.

Mind focus together with the action of physical tapping is a very fast way to change your vibrational energy almost instantaneously.You begin to feel the energy rushing through your body within a few minutes, clearing your head of old cobwebs, so to speak.

You may experience feeling detached from your original worries, sometimes even forgetting why you were upset in the first place. Suddenly the big issue does not matter any more as it is being reframed in a more constructive way. This process happens automatically during the repeated sequences of tapping and focusing. EFT dissolves your problems, literally.
About the Author
Mercedes Oestermann van Essen is an Advanced EFT Practitioner and Energy Therapist who consults worldwide via the Internet. Solve problems quickly and easily.

Get my Free Report on problem solving strategies and techniques using EFT.
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