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Dating to Make Friends: An Alternative View

Oct 12, 2007
Friends are not easy to find once you into a working environment. If you have childhood friends around that's great, but many people move far away from where they grew up, and contact with those they used to confide in becomes increasingly difficult. Finding the time to meet new people, and then spend enough time to get to a level where you trust them enough to confide in isn't easy, especially if you're also looking for a partner and using your free time to date.

If you are someone who feels more comfortable with the opposite sex, then dating is a great way of making friends. There are very few people who date only one person and then commit to them for the rest of their lives. The usual scenario is that you date a number of people who have quite a lot of things in common with you, until you find the one that you really connect with on a deeper level. The fact that you have been on a personal, if not intimate, level with the people you date puts you in a good position to transition these once potential dates into friendships.

There's a problem with this in that any future people you, or your ex date, go out with may not like the relationship and try to break it. This makes the friendship a little precarious, but as time passes, the bond of friendship and trust becomes one that both of you will be reluctant to break -- both of you appreciating what you get from the platonic relationship -- and so it becomes more secure. Even so, if you, or your friend, find a partner that they intend to make a permanent fixture in their lives your friendship together may have to be severed in order for that to happen.

Even if you're not really interested in having a deeper relationship with someone, there's nothing to stop you going out on casual dates. There are plenty of other people out there who enjoy having one-on-one time with another person without it having to lead to a "serious relationship". You may get a reputation for being a habitual dater, but that's just a label that someone who dates looking for a partner puts on it. There's nothing wrong in using the dating scene as a social meeting arena! Make your intentions known up front and you'll get to meet a number of people who have similar interests to your own, but aren't going to expect anything other than friendship in return for the time spent together.

If a serious relationship isn't what you're looking for, but you would like to find a few more friends, trying some casual dating and you'll meet some interesting people. You aren't guaranteed to build a true friendship with any or all of them, but at the very least, you'll have a good time exploring the possibility!
About the Author
Jane Saeman runs a membership site which provides thirty articles each month in the ever growing and profitable niche of Dating and Relationships. Find out how you can profit from this huge industry at my website which is at http://www.DatingNicheArticles.com
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