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Build Your Self Esteem: A Starter Guide To Self Improvement

Oct 12, 2007
In today's fast-paced, difficult environment, it can be tough to keep your self-esteem intact and to stay calm. Here are some things you can do in your quest for self-improvement and to build your self-esteem.

No matter who you are, there are things in your environment every day that can affect your self-esteem negatively. Therefore, it's important for you to protect yourself so that those influences don't affect you and bring you down. Which of these elements should you avoid?

Number one: A negative work environment

You've probably heard that "dog eat dog" is the way things go in the work environment, where everyone else is fighting competitively to get ahead and step on the other guy. This is where self-involved, uncompassionate people usually do their best. If you're struggling for recognition from coworkers, it's probably not going to happen in this type of environment, even if you work your hardest, around the clock. Therefore, for your own peace of mind and to boost self-esteem, avoid these types of work situations. A little healthy competition is fine, but not rabidly so. It should not overtake common sense, appreciation for others, or a genuine sense of accomplishment without the feeling of "beating" the other guy.

Number two: Other people's negative behavior

No matter where you work, you've doubtless run into ultra competitive people or those who are otherwise negative in some way. They may be gossipers, hangers-on, brown nosers, complainers, and the list goes on. These people do nothing but suck the energy out of others without ever giving back. They're bad for your self-esteem and self-improvement, and they're bad for every other person in that environment.

Number three: A changing environment

Although living and working within your comfort zone can be, well, comfortable, it doesn't challenge you and keep you fresh and flexible. To stay adaptable and open, you need some change in your life. Even though major changes may shake up your life for a while, and may be stressful in the short term, in fact, they often help improve things overall in the long run. In addition, no matter what you do, some change is inevitable. Therefore, instead of resisting change, accept it and be as open to it as you can.

Number four: Letting past experiences dictate your future

It's part of the human experience to experience at least some pain, and it's also inevitable that when times are painful, we're going to feel rotten for at least a while. We may even be fearful, but this is also normal and is okay in the short term, as long as you face those fears. The difficulty comes when we let pain dictate our movements and let fear limit them. Instead, learn from mistakes, face fears, and move past them.

Number five: Holding a negative worldview

Of course, we're going to see pain and trouble in our world sometimes. This is normal and when we see such things, it's also normal that we might feel uncomfortable, sad, or have other negative emotions. However, to keep your self-esteem as high as possible and to build it further, don't focus on the negative as your overriding concern. Instead, deal with the negative when you must, but move past it and focus on the positive at every opportunity.

Number six: The power of self-fulfilling prophecy and determination

Of course, we are all born with certain inherited traits, including those driven by genetics, environment, and upbringing. However, it's just as important to remember that your own identity is as important if not more important than these elements. For example, if you grew up in a family where negativism was common, it's probably a predisposition that you tend toward the negative as well. However, you can buck this trait and transcend it by surrounding yourself with positive people and taking your cues from them. Before you know it, you'll be discounting your previous "self-fulfilling prophecy" and choosing a new path.

In addition, in the end, you are the one who is the most responsible for who you become, regardless of your beginnings. Self-esteem is as much your responsibility as it is of those around you. Therefore, simply deciding that you're going to surround yourself with positive things, learn to do what you love, and taking your cues from positive people with their own high self-esteem will go a long way toward helping you reach this path. In addition, it will help you to stay away from negative thoughts if you focus on the positive as much as possible. This includes finding something to be grateful for every day, congratulating yourself for something you've done well each day, and complementing others when they do something of merit as well. This in turn, will build contentedness and happiness, and will provide you the building blocks to attain even greater heights with self-esteem and personal happiness, as well as with accomplishment and self-improvement.
About the Author
Kevin Sinclair is the publisher and editor of My-Personal-Growth.com, a site that provides information and articles for self improvement and personal growth and development.
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