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Dating Mistakes: How To Stop Waiting For The Phone To Ring

Oct 22, 2007
It seemed that you got along well the last time you went out together. He/she did say that he/she would call you. So how come he/she never did?

This article will try to help you figure out what could have gone wrong the last time you went out. The idea being that the next time you do go on a date, you'd avoid history repeating itself.

1. Talking too much, not saying a whole lot.

There is nothing wrong about a lively conversation. But remember that a conversation involves two people talking - not just you yapping away leaving your date with not a lot of room to put in his/her two cents' worth.

Also, the choice of your talk should be something your date can easily relate to. Ladies, don't expect the guy to know a whole lot about the differences between Prada and Louis Vuitton. Guys, don't make your date feel bad not knowing which sport Vince Carter plays. Pick a topic that you feel both of you have an interest in, which shouldn't be too hard given that you're on a date because you already have something in common.

2. Talking too much about past relationships.

The last thing your date wants to happen is to be compared to another person. Believe it or not, when you talk a whole lot about your past relationships you are actually comparison shopping - something that's great for your next pair of shoes, but not with a living and breathing human being. You tend to bruise their egos making them feel as if they were only second best.

3. Sending mixed messages.

Try to be aware of what kind of messages you are giving your date. Although you are not expected to be an expert on how the opposite sex's mind works, you should be aware that there are signals that send out strong messages, which you may not mean.

For example, you may be the type who just naturally connects to people by touching them. However, your date may read that kind of connection to mean something else. Being careful of these kinds of signals not only saves them the embarrassment of a mistaken assumption but also protects you from a possible advance you don't want to encounter.

4. Selling yourself.

It is important to make a good impression on a first date, but don't overdo it. You are not on a date to present your resume and convince them that you're a great person to be with. The fact that they are out with you says that they think you're okay. Keeping the conversation to topics that only concern you shows that you are more interested in yourself rather than on them.

A variation of this dating faux pax is volunteering negative information. You may feel that you are simply being honest with your date. But this is not the occasion to be revealing less than noteworthy things about you. You could tell them about how you have been in therapy for kleptomania for five years, but don't expect them to return your call anytime soon.

6. Checking out other people while on the date.

Although this is more common with men, it is by no means exclusive to them. Women are also guilty of this and it is simply not polite to do so, especially if she was the one who asked the guy out.

Asking someone out on a date tells that person that you're interested in getting to know him or her more. Checking out other men/women while you're with your date tells them otherwise. It shows you to be a very rude and inconsiderate person.

These pointers should help you get started on identifying what you may be doing wrong. If any of these may sound familiar to you, make the effort to avoid repeating these in subsequent dates.

If you feel that keeping track of a list of what not to do confusing, try to simplify things with this one thought: Your objective for dating this person is to know them better. Make this your primary objective and that alone makes them feel very special. Chances are, they in turn, will want to know more about you - leading to one successful date after another.
About the Author
My Relationship Tips has hundreds of dating and relationship tips for men and women.
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