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Personal Development and Self Confidence

Nov 9, 2007
Confidence, in simplest terms, is the ability to behave in one's natural manner. The definition appears to be a very simple definition. However, when all the aspects of this apparently simple definition are considered it is found to be far more difficult to understand and comprehend. Consider this- we live in a world, in which, advertisements are creating false needs to market things, which very few of us actually need.

Every person desires to look good, have a good physique, or become rich. Ad makers expertly pick these vanity points. Many times people have to confront superiors, who may not exactly be in a cheerful mood, and trying to appear extra polite may rob the person of his or her ability to explain things. These are only two examples to depict the loss of originality. Real life throws numerous situations in which the first instinct of a person is to mould his or her natural behavior. While some amount of this is necessary, anything greater than this can produce inferiority complexes, and in more, intense cases depression.

Personality Development as a tool to develop Self Confidence

A natural corollary, to the aforementioned things, is that in order to develop personality the first step is to stop imitating others. The person needs to focus on his or her positive traits and stop comparison with a friend, neighbor, sibling or a celebrity. It is worthwhile to remember that a person can give his best performance in life only when he behaves in a natural manner. This is simply because he is most comfortable when behaving naturally - he does not need to be told what to do, he will figure it out for himself and this will invariably produce the best results.

Fear and insecurity, which stems from fear, are other hindrances to natural behavior. Once fear is conquered, by doing exactly that which the person is afraid of, the person will automatically develop confidence that he is able to do a certain act.

The person also has to draw personal psychological boundaries and not allow anyone to transgress in them - that is to say that this is his personal space and he will not tolerate anyone's interference. This may be a bit difficult to start with, but once it is done, it will produce long lasting results. This will also make the person more assertive and therefore naturally more worthy respect.

However, the thing to remember is that the assertiveness has to be based on concrete logic and should not be just for the sake of it. Assertiveness, of the mind, has to be bolstered with that of the body - the body language needs to be confident and the assertiveness inside has to be radiated through it. Finally, it is also important to realize that mistakes are OK. Rather they act as great teachers for the future.
About the Author
Stephen C Campbell is a Master NLP Practitioner, personal coach who runs Self Development programs and a free membership site. http://www.you-can-be.com/members
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